Current Location: On my bed
Issue on Ground: Its a life situation...
Current Solution: Hmmnnn...

I'm choking right now!!

I actually can't seem to find the air to breathe!! What have I done wrong?!

I actually could have given the last of the air available on earth to this person if it ever came to that...why does it have to be like this?!

Oh God, you see that even in my thoughts I have been faithful to this person...why is it that they are so ill in their reaction toward me?!

I'm sad...I'm really sad right now...and my heart aches!!

Oh God, you know things that I can never even dream of knowing...

I guess at the end of the day, I can only trust what I know is in my own heart.

I'm scared.

If this is happening now...what does the future hold?

In trust I stand...

Current Location: Hairdresser's
Issue on Ground: Just thinking...
Current Solution: What you think...Lol

A lot of times recently, I've asked myself why the heck I'm giving my time and attention to this MTV 'giving Africa a voice' slogan matter.

As in really, what should I care...and what on this formerly green earth makes me think I can actually make a difference.

Truth is...I don't know.

I realise that nothing may change at the end of the day and I may have just wasted precious time and talent...but then again, I also wonder about myself as a person, if I don't do anything about it.

I was and still am very insulted and disappointed about that slogan being sold on air everyday...but I was just going to share my pain with you guys on the Blog and let it end there.

It was actually an Anonymous reader who gave me sleepless nights by tipping me off to the fact that I can do something about it.

Whoever you are (I suspect someone) I truly appreciate you telling me that...little do you know how you have helped transform my life.

Do you know how much difference it makes to me to know that I can actually DO something about a situation I believe deep in my conscience is wrong?

Everyday on these streets I witness situations...people..that depress me!!

I see little kids hustling during school hours for petty change.

I see young girls being forced to hawk their bodies just to be able to go to school.

I see little boys trading away the possibility of ever growing to become great men, because of an idea being sold to them that they should 'Get rich QUICK or die trying'

Its sad...very sad!! Sometimes, I feel so depressed and helpless about such things, that I retreat within myself to find comfort.

Sometimes I feel so disconnected from my environment that I don't want to see or talk to anyone (except you of course...wink)

I just want to DO something about what I consider to be important. I just want to use what iv been given to create a better world for those to whom I find myself being responsible.

That's why I'm doing this...because I CAN.

Its wrong for people...corporations..whoever, to broadcast lies just because they know they are operating in a country where everything goes. Its just WRONG!!

And I refuse to sit back and accept it.

So yes Tari, this is why its important that you do this...and even if nothing changes about the issue, that's fine cos most importantly, YOU changed...and that's the true meaning of Success.

Nevertheless, I shall keep writing, keep advocating...and hopefully one day, the voice of this obscure Ijaw girl might just be heard!!

But what am I saying...its being heard right now!

Gosh..you guys may never know what you do for me on this Blog...just by being here for me to constantly express ME to.

Thank you and I'll keep praying to God that you yourself experience the invaluable gift which you give to me.

JOIN HANDS FOR WHAT'S RIGHT SIGN THE PETITION
http://www.gopetition.com/petition/38679.html

Current Location: Hairdresser's
Issue on Ground: Taking another Hair Risk...
Current Solution: Join hands with Blog readers and pray it goes well!!


Sitting here at Rehab, waiting for my Hairdresser, Dada to do his wonders!! I've decided to come back to my natural hair from my lil braids hiatus!!

This time though, iv decided to add a lil spunk to it. Oh Lord, pls let all my hair not fall off..also pls let me not look like a sun-tanned Ram with this look.

Been watchin some TV while sitting here...Michael Jackson story, a brief bio on Eva Longoria...and Khloe Kardashian getting a Bikini Wax (??!!)

I don't remember the last time I sat through watching E!...and now I remember why!

I'm just not enthralled by the irrelevant footage of Celebrity Lifestyle...show me how to make the Network or gimme steps in turning a lil show into a multi-million dollar Global marketing platform..then I'm interested!!

No matter what though, you've gotta give it to these Kardashian bunch! They've really sold us all on the seeming bizzareness of their lives. I say 'seeming' cos what's really so different about how they live?

The only difference is that they have the balls to document it..with a little extra va-va voom!!

LOL...I can literally see the lines of the Script in this Kardashian show!! Nothing about Reality TV is real...lurve it..Lol

Oh Wow...Daily Ten...they still do that show?!

Okay so I could soooooo predict exactly how this episode of 'Khloe & Kourtney' will end right from the beginning!! Knew exactly what they were trying to do from get go!!

Yes..I am feeling very cool with myself right now...Bite me!!

Now off to wash my hair...say a lil prayer for me so I don't go through the BAD hair phase all over again!!

Current Location: Bedroom
Issue on Ground: Eemm..norrin mush..just pacing
Current Solutions: Forget solutions for now...just ENJOY...

I really, really love Cece Winans 'Throne Room' album!!

I'm drawn in every single time I listen to it. First time I ever experienced it was like 6-7yrs ago!

I remember, I just used to drive to and from school all caught up in the amazing worship it creates!!

That's one album that few months ago, I actually went to look for the original copy to buy!

The one I had back then was pirated and even got lost. But when I wanted it this year I knew I would be a Biatch if I didn't put some money into Cece's pocket for what I know I will (and have) enjoyed from it.

So now I've reconnected with the experience all over again and this time LEGALLY...Lol

Every song on this album, I carry with me at different points in time..and they're about 15. (Ok there's one I no de too feel sha...and its playing right now)

In this 'Throne Room' album, she's mostly speaking TO God, worshipping Him and telling Him how wonderful He is.

However in the 'Purified' album (which came out after this), she's speaking FROM God. Like she's HIS Voice, telling you and I deep things from the heart of God.

Its amazing!!! *contented sigh*

Ooooohhh....and guess who went on a date today?!! *smiling mischievously*

*in sing-song voice* I'm NOT TELLINNNGGG.......*now whistling*

Current Location: sitting in car outside house
Issue on Ground: hmmmnn..feeling veerryyy alone
Current Location: try and make a connection via blog

I wonder if I have a right to feel this way though! Its not like I'm all alone in some foreign country with no family and friends around.

No...right inside this building, I have the most loving family present. So why do I feel this sense of disconnect?!

Neither of my Lovers (Mr Classic n Smooth) have even succeeded in making me feel better tonight.

Timbuktu has his family..I felt really bad earlier on when I grabbed him from the intimate family time they were having and hugged him tightly.

I'm hungry.

I should probably go have a meal...and maybe some wine...nah..don't like drinking at times like this..makes me dependent!!

I've been invited to speak at an Event being organised by some Youth group tomorrow...I haven't even prepared yet.

Maybe I should go do that instead of feeling sorry for myself! What would I say to them I wonder...

"Hello, my name is Tari and I feel like a TRAIN-WRECK!!!"

Or.."Of all the sane people in Lagos and around the world, you select this neurotic and overtly psychotic freak to come speak to you (then release wild madman-like laughter as punctuation)!!"

Maybe selecting what to wear would make me feel better now! I really shouldn't be doing this to myself...sooooo not healthy.

I blame it on the hair-do...I call it my Pension-starved Prostitute look...and rightly so, as it just got me bounced from Bungalows (imagine...my Beer Parlour)!! Bouncers probably thought I was a prostitute, hence the "We don't allow single ladies.." approach.

I just wanted to have myself a quiet beer all by myself and I got bounced!! LOL...ok at least that has made me laugh now!

So funny...I didn't even argue..its not by force to go and spend my money abi?! Even better..lemme save..I might be a broke-ass Street Bum soon..so I better treasure every kobo I have now!!

Anyway, thanks for at least helping me laugh at my own expense...can't believe I was bounced....LMAO!!!

Its this facking hair-do!!

Wow...I feel so much better..I guess I'm not that messed up after-all!! This blog na wa...

Princess Diaries

I absolutely enjoy being a PRINCESS!!!

And Lande, my Niece, can see that, which is why she painted me this BREATHTAKING picture...



Can you see my Palace in the background?! *dancing*

Current Location: Studio in major TV station

Issue on Ground: BORED out of my mind...but I have to be here

Current Solution: Document thots...

Woke up feeling quite nauseous this morning..still feel that way actually!! And NO..I'm not preggies...except I'm the new Mary a la Immaculate Conception.

I feel really woozy and like I can just randomly throw-up all over this studio right now. I wonder how they'll react to that...

Its one of those days when I've decided to take matters into my own hands, and so have bombarded this place with an armoury of Demands which I know they will usually not meet.

But when I'm in this mode, 'NO' is not a word I understand...so I'm here to get what I want, whether or not they are able to give it to me or not. Somehow, some way..they'll just have to find a way to make it happen.

And all I'm gonna do is ask nicely. *smile*

Tariere..where do you get this kind of confidence from?! You know very well that they wouldn't give ANYONE what it is you're about to ask them for...what makes you believe they'd just hand it over to you.

Hmmmnnn...I can't answer that question actually...I guess I just KNOW. I want this...I have to HAVE this..so I'm gonna ask them and leave the rest to God.

Thing is I can't sit down hoping and praying that this will come cos it would NOT. I have to at least try abi?! I really want to make this happen...and so I'm gonna rely entirely on God's ability to do the Impossible.

That's actually the story of my life...God doing the Impossible. I asked Him for something which by all means would have been deemed Impossible last week, and barely 24hrs later, He made it happen.

God answers prayers and He answers them even beyond our expectations.

I guess that's the answer to my earlier question..HE is my Confidence. He sets the stage for all things to come to be..and so ill just DO my part by being here and actually daring to Demand the Impossible, while He handles every other thing from there.

Great partnership isn't it?! Me and my Father.

He's sooooo POWERFUL. I guess that's why I'm soooo attracted to powerful men because they remind me of my heavenly Father.

Powerful as my Father is, yet He is so HUMBLE. I mean, a God that stoops down from His glorious throne to fellowship and walk with our tainted Humanity.

He is Humble and His humility inspires the heck out of me. Who am I that He should accompany me here right now?!

Who am I that He ALWAYS goes ahead of me to make my paths straight?!

Who am I that He makes Himself readily available whenever I call on Him (and I do call on Him a whole lot)?!

Who am I that He speaks with me, laughs with me, feasts with me and allows me rest in His bosom?!

Who am I?!

Well I guess I'm just a shameless Daddy's Girl.

Current Location: My Bed..chilling with Mr Timboks
Issue on Ground: Nada..just excited!!


The time is exactly 4:19am right now!!

Interesting isn't it?! Its the morning after my Birthday and I haven't been able to sleep..excitement from too many things!!

Oh, you guys I had a great party!! I wanted a FABULOUS party with heels, and hair, and swag!!

LMAO!!!

How ridiculous am I?! Getting caught up in all the Ridiculousness of this city I live in!!

I love God's sense of humor and the way in which He does for you what HE knows is right...when You've asked Him to take control that is.

He gave me a GREAT EXPERIENCE!!!

I'm actually giggling as I think of it ALL right now!!

It was like intimate family partying for me..all my MAIN people were around!! Well, not all..The Bestie is not around so she couldn't be there!! *sad*

My adopted brothers and sisters were though..and we had a BLAST!!

I kept trying to DUCK everytime John was about to take pictures of me with a glass in my hand!! I suspect you guys believe I'm a FREAKING Champ-aign (as Yvonne calls it) Mistress!!

So I decided NO MORE pictures of me holding glasses!! I doubt I succeeded in that though...

I had a GREAT birthday guys..nOw I just wanna SLEEP!!

Oh..and thanks to my Egbon who threw me the party!! Love you Bro!!

(This Diary entry was written at 4am but posted at 2pm)

Current Location: My Bed
Issue on Ground: Just wondering..
Current Solution: Me sef I wonder...

I had quite an interesting experience tonight.

I went into an infamous Lounge Bar tonight with my girlfriends. My girls were really excited to go there..I kinda caught their bug and so we all went.

From way before I even got there, I had been asking myself the question, "What the helcks are u goin to do in there, Ta-ri-ereeeee?!!"

But I just chinned that voice and as usual (not so much lately sha) did exactly what I WANTED to do!!

Enter the Lounge Bar...two guys who are about the only people there, enduring the agony of the extremely LOUD music blasting from the disproportionate sound systems, are distracted from the bucket of Champagne they'd been nursing.

"Alas..the Entertainment have arrived"..I could almost hear the smile in their voices..in their heads.

Assumptionist Tari abi?! Well, barely 7mins after, I was proven right.

Sent the Waitress over to tell us to join them, clincher being the bottles of Champagne they were offering.

My Super Fronter friend handled the Negotiation, and soon, one of them came over by himself to bargain.

They were soon grabbing extra chairs and joining our table. Surprisingly, one of them took the seat beside me..just when I thought I was invisible, all huddled up in my pashmina and bored expression.

The other parked himself beside my Super Pretty friend.

So Dude beside me revealed that he was visiting from out of town and was being shown around by his brother, who is an 'Executive' with...(one of the largest Oil companies in Nigeria)

With the proud way he said that, it was clear he expected a response from me. If only he knew that one of the thoughts I had just had was "So you're not even the Alpha Male".

The Alpha Male is confident in who he is and so doesn't feel the need to brag on his Brother's or anyone else's achievement or status, to gain favor.

Instead, I found THIS response escaping from my mouth.."So you're looking for some Pleasure to complete your Business with".

He laughed....so I laughed with him knowing I HAD him.

Then I couldn't resist adding "..And the moment WE entered, you saw the opportunity you have been desiring, present itself?"

I admire his "I have NO response to that" answer, amidst his convulsive laughter.

I laughed with him again. I appreciate honesty....especially when you can sense that someone isn't buying your B.S.

We eventually had a conversation about Male-Female mindsets toward new people they meet.

For example, to my new friend, a group of young women walking into a Lounge all by themselves...screamed 'AVAILABLE - ACCESSIBLE BOOTY'.

Its amazing how difficult it becomes to see someone beyond that Stereotype, regardless of what she does or say to counter it.

Two MARRIED men out at 11pm without their wives..obviously looking for some action, and NO-ONE bats an eyelid about it.

But FOUR Single young women out to enjoy each other's company, while they spend their HARD-EARNED cash on a bottle of Hennessey and Cokes (although my Super Naughty friend was generously buying tonight), and they are labelled 'AVAILABLE - ACCESSIBLE BOOTY'...there only for perverse Entertainment!!!

Yes, there are young women (I know plenty) who go out with the sole purpose of being the ACTION; but can GUYS be decent enough NOT to assume that every young, Beautiful, Fun-loving woman they meet is to be TOUCHED?!

Thank You, my Father, for bringing me home in safety and without Compromise.

(This Diary entry was written Sunday Night, but was posted Monday Night)

Values Worth Living & Dying For

I stumbled across these words while doing some Research this morning. They are indeed some of the most beautiful words I've EVER read!! I want to share them with you...

Civil Rights Movement Leader, Martin Luther King Jr., speaking about what people should remember him for if they are present at his funeral:

“ I'd like somebody to mention that day that Martin Luther King Jr. tried to give his life serving others. I'd like for somebody to say that day that Martin Luther King Jr. tried to love somebody.

I want you to say that day that I tried to be right on the war question. I want you to be able to say that day that I did try to feed the hungry.

I want you to be able to say that day that I did try in my life to clothe those who were naked.

I want you to say on that day that I did try in my life to visit those who were in prison. And I want you to say that I tried to love and serve humanity.

Yes, if you want to say that I was a drum major. Say that I was a drum major for justice. Say that I was a drum major for peace. I was a drum major for righteousness. And all of the other shallow things will not matter."



Martin Luther King Jr.

Great words from an astoundingly GREAT Leader..No matter what Guys, let's NEVER lose sight of what's truly Important.

Please Let's Get Some Things Straight...

This is not an article or any kind of intellectual stimulating post.

Just thought I should put that out there in case you had any sort of expectations. This is me sitting all by myself at a Photo-Shoot, being the Unfriendly, Anti-Social Model Wannabe, working on her laptop while she listens to MoHits ‘I Wanna be Close To You’ from my I-pod.

I really don’t know why I do this sometimes. I retreat into some kind of shell and prefer to watch the people in the same place with me from a safe distance.

There is something on my mind though; I was going through the comments on my Bella Naija article titled 'Why Can’t We Be Friends?!' (oh by the way, I have a new Column on Bella…Yaaayyyyyy!!!), and I’d be honest, that may be responsible for my sudden withdrawal into ‘Quiet Mode’.

I’ve learned over time to be non-reactive toward both positive and negative feedback from my Work, so that’s not what this is about. In the article, I was talking about whether or not it is safe to be friends with your Exes. As usual, I used myself as the case Study, citing the different kinds of reactions I have to memories of past relationships.

I don’t want to spill all the beans for those of you who haven’t read the article, but I REALLY need to say this for my own sanity.

I NEVER try to give ANYONE the Illusion of me being a Saint or even anything close. When I talk about something, especially as I use my personal experience, I’m not going to censor myself or tell the story in such a way as to suit the individual moral codes/ideas/opinions of whoever is reading it.

As a Writer and as a Human being, my comfort zone is being completely honest and open about whatever subject I’m speaking about, whether or not it conforms to the ideals people set for themselves in their heads.

I’m not a Virgin. I have been in quite a number of relationships and YES I did have sex with the people I was with. I choose NOT to define myself by that as I believe my life is a journey and those experiences were merely a little phase I have since left behind.

So if I choose to talk about that in showing the transition I have made, and it insults the sensitivities of anyone reading it, then I’d suggest finding another person who censors themselves much better than I do.

It baffles me that someone’s idea of a ‘Christian’ is one that should shut up about the reality of what their experiences have been so that people can buy the false idea of ‘Holiness’ they are selling. I can only imagine the burden Life is for those who go through it judging and defining themselves by past mistakes and experiences.

So as I sit here being Anti-Social, I’m going to CLEARLY state a few things about myself, to make this easier for you and I. if you are not comfortable with Me as I am, please spare yourself the agony of coming back here:

• I feel ABSOLUTELY no shame or discomfort talking about experiences, positive or negative, which have come together in shaping the person that I have now become. Yes, I do feel Vulnerable sometimes, but it lasts only a few minutes.

• I believe in telling the TRUTH of a story; that means that I will NOT censor myself, if I choose to speak about an issue. If I feel the need to censor myself, I’d rather NOT say anything.

• I truly feel sorry for people who define me by the experiences of the past and even try to address or relate with me based on that; it’s like trying to relate with a DEAD person, because that TARI doesn’t exist anymore.

• I love God with most of my heart. My vices and weaknesses struggle for the very little bit that I sometimes withhold from Him. It’s a struggle, but I thank God, I mostly WIN than lose.

• I interact with lots of DIFFERENT kinds of people, primarily because I am a LOVER of People. Nevertheless, I am completely my OWN person; a feat that has taken only the grace of God to attain.

• I’m not the best person there is, but I think I’ve managed to glimpse the best of ME, which I’m more interested in expressing in ALL I do.

- Oh and yes, I LOVE to have FUUNNNNN!!!!!

Thanks for listening. Now I feel MUCH better. Maybe I’ll go hang out with the others so I can be FABULOUS for the Shoot and not the Grouch I suspect wants to takeover.

Current Location: My Bed!
Issue on Ground: Can't sleep and tummy hurts...
Current Solution: Think GOOD thoughts and WRITE!!!

The pain is subsiding..it stabs me occassionally just to remind me its there, but I guess the choice is mine: I can let it ravage me bitter, or choose instead to draw from the streams of exhiliration that's bubbling in places no ulcer can reach.

Tonight (yesterday) I spoke at the MTN Industry Nite Special. It was a great event; fulfilled the purpose for which it was being held..quite a rare feat.

In ALL the goodness that the event held, I was most overwhelmed by the love and support that I was shown by SOOOO many people:

My Mum (Prof Mummy)- Who in her usual way, would not let me leave her prescence without laying her hands over my head and BLESSING me. She tells me ALL the time how beautiful and precious I am. She tells me how close I am to God's heart and ALWAYS looks at me with such pride in her eyes, that I sometimes wonder if the ME she sees is different.

My Sisters: Tonbofa, Tonye, Thelma, Timi..I really dunno what I'd do without the T Bunch. Trust my Dad to give all HIS girls names that begin with 'T'.

My Friends: Jibola Alfred, Toni Tones, Aisha Ibrahim, Seun Opaleye, Pauly Pablo, Debola Osipitan...you guys are AMAZING!!! You have become like a WALL around me..an impenetrable wall, in which I know I'm safe. You have accepted me in ALL my eccentricities, and daily I find the strength to be ME cos I know that the more of ME I reveal, the more love and grace I find with you.

My Egbons: You know who you are..my BIG BROTHERS!!! You have set such a standard for me..taught me what I should accept and given me the courage to rise above the murky waters that I allowed myself to swim in at different points in time. You are the voice of my Father in my life; loving, encouraging, scolding, teaching. I know I'm SAFE because of the love I see in your eyes, hear in your words. I feel sorry for the guys who come around me cios I know they'd have to ACE your tests of Excellence..knowing you as true GOD-MEN has given me the courage to believe that I can have my very own.

I also want to thank Matthew Ohio..for believing in me and taking a shot in the dark for me; my beloved cousin and P.A., John Amos, I dunno what I would do without you J-Boi; the nice guy who took care of my phones and bag all evening (dunno his name); Solomon Ikhioda, Paul Olaleye, Aunty Mimi of Troyka Group; and surporisingly, Olisa Adibua, for showing me kindness tonight, even though he hates me!! Olisa you know I'm not intimidated by that gruff exterior you show the world; I experienced the warmth of your heart along with your Intelligence tonight, and iv been reminded why you are undoubtedly the best at what you do.

Yaaayyyyy!!! My tummy doesn't hurt anymore!! The joy in my heart has washed over the pain in my belly. I think its time to visit the beautiful Doctor with the exotic name agin though.

Alright maybe ill sleep now..but before I go, I wanna say something to YOU my TARIERE reader:

YOU have given ME a place where I can BE. You allow me express who I am and that's one of the greatest blessings I know I have. So I want to thank ALL of you..every single one of you, for letting this girl into the most sacred of places..YOUR HEARTS.

Current Location: On the way back from party..ABUJJAA!!!
Current Situation: Scared of myself...

I just told a woman I met that "She's a veerryyy sexy woman.."

Don't run away pleeaasseeee...Im serious guys, she was sooooooo freaking SEXXYYY OMG!!!
The moment I stepped into the party, she told me I was Beautiful and I told her that I thot she was as well.

Lemme admit, iv had some..lots of Champagne as I write this..but this blog is for my Self-Expression..so I have to say ALL on it. My GOD-MAN, quick rescue me so I can tell you EVERYTHING and not have to share ALL on this blog!!!

It was a great party, the House of Reps member whose parry it was was also really nice!! But this Lady who had to be the SEXIEST woman iv ever seen, shook me up a little.

For some weird reason, I think everyone there but me knew somethin about this lady...Hmmnn..maybe that's why no guy came around me all the while I was there!!

My goodness I flirted shamelessly with that Lady..and she threw it right back at me with much more expertise!!

I think I berra sharrap now before I completely throw all of myself into the river.

Gosh the way I ran out of that place ehn..I didn't even say good-bye to her...

As much as babes say guys are messed up..I want my God-Man, what he has up in his head, in his heart, and YES down in his pants as well!!!!!

RUN, TARIERE, RUUUNNNNN......

Current Location: Salon...Abuja

Issue On Ground: Acting Bitchy!!!

Solution: I honestly don't care!!


I started acting BITCHY from the moment I walked into this Salon. I'm very obsessive about Comfort and Value for Money, so from the point I walked in and saw tons of people cramped into a tiny space, with hardly any room for me to throw my legs on a side chair, in my natural Salon Posture, the resident Bitch in me delightfully raised her dashing head!!

The problem right now is that my Resident Bitch, inconsiderate and Diva-ish as she is, can hardly find anything to bitch about!

The good-naturedness of the Salon Owner and her staff is like cold water poured on her sparks. They are so funny, kind and team-spirited, and have met my need for Comfort through their ATTITUDE rather than the 'tooshness' of their place.

In fact maybe a little too comfy...the guy blow-drying my hair has had his crotch against my arm for the duration of this blow-dry!!

Now how do we address this? One, he might be a FREAK who is doing it on purpose. Two, he may just be sooo into his work and I'm the freak whose distance from the opposite sex is causing her to notice that the Dudue's crotch is on my arm!!

Hmmnn..so to be silent or to speak up?! Aahhhh..no need..the arm and the crotch have parted ways!!

My hair's looking good though! Still I miss Lagos..they DO me right!! And I am talking about my hair!!

For some very weird reason, I just felt a strong desire to be married right now!!

Its all this testeterone (I'm soooo sure this is not the spelling..but you get my drift) causing it..Men are quite the ish aren't they?!

MEN ROCK!!!!

Current Location: Bathtub in far away Abuujaa!!
Issue on Ground: Being a CopyCat

Yeah, I'm feeling every inch like the Rev. Run himself right now, as I lie in this tub bloggin.

Only difference is I'm being extra careful so my BB doesn't fall into the water..iv even practised catchin it with my chest..note the use of the word 'chest' and not 'breasts'. For some of us, what we have is a slightly raised platform on our chest..unlike others that can boast of having 'breasts' and even jig it in your face just in case you missed the boast.

I wonder if I can ever get a Breast Implants...hmmnnn..the question is, do I want bigger breasts?!

Is there anything wrong with my breasts the way they are?! I guess it has its advantages and disadvantages. One of the advantages being the ability to get away with wearing almost anything..and also not having to cause one of those cartoon-like traffic accidents when running.

Big breasts on the other hand, as far as I'm concerned, are just too-gbasky!! Depending on the shape, volume and swag of the Bearer, they can be such a breastly blessing!! However, I can only imagine what its like having breasts that introduce themselves to people before you even get a chance to introduce yourself.

Alright hold up...how did we get talking about breasts again?! I know I started out with Rev Run..what to he and breasts have in common?!

Maybe I should name this post 'The Adventures of Run and the Breast' OR 'The Breast Chronicles According to Rev. Run'...hmmnn I kinda like that one!!

It sounds too good, they might even steal it from me. Anuway, remember where you heard it first..

I guess ill just continue to lie here and hope my 'raised platforms' catch my phone if it decides to take a dive.

So there you have it, another advantage of Small Breasts...they also double-up as LifeGuards!!

Current Location: My bed!!

Issue on Ground: NOTHINGGG!!! I'm at PEAACCEEE!!!!!!!

Yes I am. Its been a beautiful day(yesterday)! Remember my theme for the day was 'CELEBRATION'?! Well, God definitely had a reason for making me embrace that as my theme, cos there has been sooo much to Celebrate in just one day!!

First of all, I must have written like 3 articles today!! There is something soo liberating about expressing myself through my Work..in those moments when I'm constructing a story and then expressing through whatever form I'm inspired to, its like I'm in my own Eden, cos I'm completely unaware of anythin but what's coming from within me.

The only thing that distracts me these days is this BB creature!!

I had a delightful time at Bible Study today (yesterday). I really enjoy it cos we're so few, and its interactive, with everyone havin the opportunity to express themselves freely about whatever issues we draw out of the Bible passages we share.

I asked a question, and was given the most profound, yet liberating (I know iv used that word twice in this post, but understand) answer about accepting death as a natural process in Life's Evolution.

I shared it with Toni Tones and we talked excitedly for almost an hour about it!! Ill share it with you on the blog soon.

Yaaayyyy!!! I had a fabulous day..the new one is already begun in great strides!!

I love You, Father. I keep telling You that You make every moment brand new..pls don't get tired of me saying it again...

You make every moment brand new. *gigantic smile, hugs & kisses*

Current Location: Lying on Couch in Office
Issue on Ground: Fear - Vulnerability
Current Solution: .....

Alright lemme just say it..I've been feeling extremely vulnerable since my last post!! I read it soon after I posted it and realised how exposed I. Was in it. So I've been feelin weird since yesterday.

A lot of people think I'm Strong for being able to come on the blog and talk about myself, and the things I have to deal with, little do they know how I feel after I do that. Sometimes, if I could have my way, I'd yank every single one of those posts in which I reveal myself down, and erase the memories of everyone who may have seen them.

I shiver in fear sometimes when I feel like my entire life is out there for everyone to judge and assess, whether they understand what I'm talking about or not. At those times though, I feel God's prescence like never before and He assures me that even if I'm naked before the entire world, He'll cover me and make sure I wouldn't get hurt in any way.

He has done the same for me this morning..after I woke up feeling all alone and vulnerable. He has re-assured me of His commitment to love me in spite of me and now I rest in the comfort of knowing that.

Sometimes I wish I was a much better person who is able to rise above fear, need for attention and all my other vices, but I realise that the greatest injustice I can do to myself is berate myself for being at the stage in the journey that I am.

Yes, that's what my life is...a Journey. I've come a very looonngg way and I choose to instead celebrate that.

So today, that is the theme I embrace 'CELEBRATION'!!! Thank You, Father..Your encouragement and patience in making me see who I am as You see me, rather than what my limited vision sees, is what empowers me each new day, to be ME.

Thank You and Lord, you and I know that I would need more encouragement from You today...

Current Location: Bistro in GRA, Ikeja.

Issue on Ground: Tempted to smoke a cigarette!!

Why its an issue: I've quit for a while and if I dare light one up now, TROOBBLLEEE!!!!

Current Solution: BLAB on Blog to distract myself!!

What shall I blab about? I dunno..let's see..maybe this suddenly famous device called VUVUZELA!!

Up until this moment when it was being talked about on CNN..ok and maybe last night when my cousin enlightened me, I could have sworn it was a Vulva-related device!!

The question on my mind was: How come it only became this popular during this World Cup?!

Is there something about Female World Cup fans that need the prompt attention of a Vulva..sorry I mean Vulvuzela?!!

Hmmnn..am I running out of Blabs?!!

The ciggis look sooo pretty as they prostitute themselves for me on the Bar! I can almost hear them screaming "Aunty don't I look HOOTTT", "Aunty I give great PUFFSS!!",as they wiggle their tobacco-filled hips and pout the Federal Ministry of Health signed lips, in my direction!!

How about "Aunty one puff of me and your lungs will make Alec Wek look oyinbo"..freaking bitches!! You're not gonna get me this time..fecking overrated Badly Burnt Air!!

So for once, the Obsessive Writer that I am is gonna have a typo-filled post..becos of these Ciggi-bitches!!!

Maybe I should buy them ALL, out them on the floor outside, and reverse my muddy tyres all over their faces..that ought to teach them not to flirt with me!!

What the helcks..what part of "IT'S OVER" don't they undertstand?!

Tariere, wait calm down...is it possible that there's some other reason why you want to smoke?! Why is it today of all days, after ALL this time, that you are tempted?!

Shut up..Madam Too-Know!! What do you know?! So because I feel like smoking I have to be bothered about something?! When you felt like eating chocolate cake..and went to get it last week..did I say there was anything bothering you?! If you've got nothing to say, I suggest you shut your fat ass up!!

My ass is not fat anymore *sticking tongue out*..it never was! It was well-formed, sexy and a great, great companion..a much berra one than you I might add!! *now turning back*

Why is this place so empty?! I kinda like it though..there is a certain Celeb here..I decided to let him/her and their date stay alone in the VIP section *wink*. I told them.."Let me leave this place for you guys!!"

They couldn't even say "No, its okay.stay"..obviously need their privacy I see!!

Anyway, I shall just bask in my own priva....YAAAYYYYYYYY..my Sherperd's Pie is here...ttcchhewww..False Alarm!!

I asked for a side of Chilli sauce to be served with my Pie..I wonder what that'll taste like!! The Naija babe in me can never fail to disappoint..Sherperd's Pie with Chilli Sauce...

Kai..my hand de pain me small oooo..all this typing!! I love Richard Quest..he means Business!! *smile*

Seriously, how long does it take for a Sherperd's Pie to be ready?! Its been almost 30 mins now!!

Haven't ordered a drink yet..what should I have?! I wonder if white wine would taste funny with my Pie?!

Is it too early for a Henny & Coke?! Taaaaa..Long Island Bastard..NEVER!! At least not this afternoon..before my meeting!!

Maybe ill just do a Sprite on ice and lemon! A lemony-iced Sprite!! A Spritely-iced Lemon!! A freaking drink..PSYCHO!!!

This Ciggi-bithces just poked my side again!! They are becoming more audacious I see...

Hmmnn..maybe if I don't inhale..just puff on it?! But then ill be all smelly at my meeting! C'mon Sharraappp..how many perfumes do you have between your bag and glove compartment?!!

You know what...NO. And that's final..no word about CiggaWinch anymore!!

They bring the cutlery to make you think the food is right behind *now craning my neck to see*..Err..not even a hint of the odour!! I'm not even 'hearing' the smell!! LMAO!!

They gonna think I'm crazy here...YAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

And the Sherperd's Pie has now arrived!!

Looks delicious, smells divine!!

Ciao peeps..thanks for enduring my Blabs! Ur the bestest!!!!