Humilating Uniforms Anonymous

I sat one afternoon sometime ago with a group of Security Guards at the gate of an estate in Ikoyi. They spoke; I listened (at first trying to pretend that I wasn’t..not to seem rude)

They spoke of Politics, profiled the different Ethnic groups in Nigeria, and of course, the forthcoming Elections!!

By the way, they will be voting for whatever Candidate whose posters, or other Campaign material is thrust in their faces more. Politicians, Election Strategists, Campaign Managers, and everyone else with a stake, please take note; the race is to the one with the highest Media expenditure!!

But is this really so?!

It’s possible to spend chunks of cash on Advertising and Publicity, but at the end of the day, rake in shreds of dismal failure as your returns. A few Events come to mind as case study, but I shall sharrap!!

It’s the ‘shooting blanks’ principle that plays itself out in those circumstances. Like trying to pitch a new line of Superhero costumes to the Pope!!

Right Product; Wrong Audience

Alright, I don’t really know where I’m going with this, as I am just ranting right now!!

Okay, the Guards!!

They had really nice uniforms, which I couldn’t help complimenting them on. After the ‘thanks’ and squaring of their shoulders to stand taller, I probed further:

"Does it make you work better when you like your uniform?"

“Yes”, Okechukwu replied, “It makes you feel confident and proud of what you do”

I can totally identify.

I immediately felt immense compassion for all the millions of people around the world who have to right now wear Winnie the Pooh, Mighty Mouse..and all those other highly embarrassing uniforms to earn a living!!

My heart goes out to you..remember, the Uniform doesn’t make you, you make it!!

My heart especially, goes out to our resident Men in Black..the underpaid members of the Nigeria Police Force, who have to prowl under the harsh Naija sun to do their job, in a coarse BLACK uniform, and are still expected to perform without collecting bribes (not even for for ice-water)!!

Do you wear (or have you ever had to) wear a uniform you hate? Share with us...

Prayerful Politicking

In the Church I went to yesterday, the Pastor called out to anyone present who was vying for Political office in the 2011 Elections, to come forward.

They all trooped out...about 10 of them. Some actual Candidates, others representing family members or friends who were contesting.

One guy even represented two of his friends!!

The Pastor asked them to all state their names and what offices they were running for.

I remember flinching when an elderly lady amongst them said she's 'pleading' on behalf of her son who is running for (she wasn't too sure about the particular office)...Senate in the East.

The Pastor asked the Church congregation to stretch forth their hands and pray for them. My hand stayed right where it was and my eyes remained wide open.

Why should I pray for them?!

Because we are in Church? Have they declared 'Why' they are running or what vision they have to change the lives of the people whom they are gunning 'to serve'?

I will pray for God to protect someone who I can see and hear actually has a passion for the people...not for their pockets.

Since when does the fact that someone is sitting in Church make them a good person who is qualified to lead me?! I actually felt somewhat insulted that I was being called on to trade my intelligence for religous sentiment by the Pastor asking me to pray for them to succeed.

If they were all called onto that podium and asked to state their dream for Nigeria or anything that can give me even the slightest insight into their intentions, then all would have been well.

I call on spiritual leaders, or anyone that has authority over any group of people...please use your influence wisely.

If these guys who were being prayed for yesterday do make it to office and start messing up, I seriously doubt we will find them to pray against then.

If you really feel the need to pray, then pray that the Election process is fair and that your vote should count.

'Bars' & The Collective National Psyche

Tones and I were just having a conversation about 'Bars' in Lagos.

No..not alcohol serving Bars, but iron bars that barricade most homes and general buildings in Lagos and other parts of the country.

The purpose of these bars is to protect the inhabitants of a building from Armed Robbers and other such 'Visitors of the Dark'.

Tones is of the opinion that they are very necessary for every home to have if you want to be safe.

I agree.

However, I wonder about the fact that in this country, we need to imprison ourselves to feel safe.

What differentiates us from the inmates of Rikers Island or Kirikiri?!

Goodluck Jonathan in his Election Speech, spoke about fighting crime and putting punitive measures in place...sounds good!!

But we also need to SEE it happen by feeling safe in our own homes without the ominous prescence of 'Bars'.

I also wonder about how jaded we've become as a people if our illusion of safety is with us behind 'Bars'.

We really do need an overhaul in our collective national psyche. Imagine the state of mind a child who is being delivered right now in St. Nicholas Hospital or at a Maternity Centre in my village, Patani, is being born into.

Please people, let's vote wisely in this Elections.

Our Collective National Sanity depends on it.